Artmaking and the Right to Oppose
The naĂŻve desire most of us harbor that we can somehow connect and understand each other through reasoning is based on the wrong assumption that our rational ideas are the only rational ideas.
In gentle parenting, there is a concept called “the right to oppose.”
The principle states that it is our job as parents to show our kids what we need them to do. For them, it is developmentally appropriate to protest and oppose what we need them to do.
Maybe this principle provides relief, and maybe it doesn’t when it comes to the struggles of parenting.
For me, it does.
Especially in instances when I think my kids have more will than I do, like when my oldest wants short sleeves, and I think it is more appropriate for her to wear long sleeves. Is one more layer of clothing worth a conniption attack in California weather?
It is a great concept to keep in mind for interpersonal relationships, too.
It is normal for any one person to have their agenda as to how they should live their life, and the deeper the relationships go, the more opportunities to find discrepancies between what you believe and what the other person believes.
Isn't it easier to know that we are always going to face opposition? The only person we can 100% agree with is ourselves, but even then, our agreement with our position may vary as we learn more about ourselves and the world.
Once we accept that understated fact of life, we can move forward, figuring out ways to collaborate.
Responses